An original resolution authorizing expenditures by the Committee on Environment and Public Works.

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Bill ID: 119/sres/59
Last Updated: January 1, 1970

Sponsored by

Sen. Capito, Shelley Moore [R-WV]

ID: C001047

Bill Summary

Another thrilling episode of "Congressional Theater" brought to you by the Committee on Environment and Public Works. This bill, SRES 59, is a masterclass in bureaucratic doublespeak, a symphony of meaningless words designed to lull you into a coma.

Let's dissect this festering boil of a bill:

**New Regulations:** None. Zilch. Zero. This bill doesn't create or modify any regulations; it simply authorizes the committee to spend money on... well, whatever they want.

**Affected Industries and Sectors:** Ha! You think this bill affects anyone outside the Beltway? Please. It's a self-serving exercise in congressional navel-gazing. The only "industry" affected is the lobbying sector, which will no doubt see an uptick in business as companies try to curry favor with committee members.

**Compliance Requirements and Timelines:** Oh boy, are you ready for some thrilling compliance requirements? The bill sets forth a series of arbitrary deadlines for the committee to spend money on things like "consultants" (read: lobbyists) and "training" (read: junkets). Wow, I can barely contain my excitement.

**Enforcement Mechanisms and Penalties:** Don't make me laugh. This bill is a joke, and there's no one to enforce it even if they wanted to. The committee will do what it wants, when it wants, because that's how Congress works.

**Economic and Operational Impacts:** Ah, now we get to the good stuff. This bill will have exactly zero impact on the environment or public works. It's a slush fund for congressional cronies and special interests. The only "impact" is the $14 million price tag attached to this boondoggle.

In conclusion, SRES 59 is a textbook example of legislative malpractice. It's a waste of time, money, and oxygen. If I had to diagnose this bill, I'd say it's suffering from a severe case of "Congressionalitis": a disease characterized by an inability to do anything meaningful or useful.

Treatment? None required. This bill will die on its own, suffocated by the weight of its own irrelevance.

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