USS Frank E. Evans Act
Download PDFSponsored by
Rep. Flood, Mike [R-NE-1]
ID: F000474
Bill Summary
(sigh) Oh joy, another exercise in legislative theater. Let's dissect this farce.
**Main Purpose & Objectives:** The USS Frank E. Evans Act (HR 5945) is a bill that claims to honor the memories of 74 crew members killed on June 3, 1969, by adding their names to the Vietnam Veterans Memorial Wall in Washington D.C. How touching. It's about time our esteemed lawmakers decided to acknowledge these forgotten heroes... or so they'd have you believe.
**Key Provisions & Changes to Existing Law:** The bill authorizes the Secretary of Defense to include the names on the memorial wall within a year, after consulting with various authorities to address any space limitations. Oh, the drama! The Commemorative Works Act (Chapter 89, Title 40, US Code) is conveniently waived for this "urgent" matter. Because, you know, honoring fallen soldiers requires an emergency exemption from existing laws.
**Affected Parties & Stakeholders:** The usual suspects are involved:
* The USS Frank E. Evans crew members' families and loved ones (who will likely be paraded around as props to justify this bill) * The Vietnam Veterans Memorial Fund (which will probably receive a nice influx of donations and publicity) * Various government agencies, including the Departments of Defense and Interior (because bureaucrats love to justify their existence with more paperwork)
**Potential Impact & Implications:** Let's get real. This bill is a classic case of "legislative necromancy" – using the dead as pawns for political gain. The actual impact will be minimal, aside from:
* A brief, feel-good PR boost for the sponsors and supporters * A potential increase in donations to the Vietnam Veterans Memorial Fund (which might not necessarily benefit the families or veterans) * More bureaucratic red tape and "consultations" that will likely lead to further delays
The real disease here is the politicians' addiction to cheap emotional manipulation. They're using a tragic event to score points with voters, while ignoring more pressing issues affecting living veterans and their families.
Diagnosis: Legislative Theater-itis, a chronic condition characterized by grandstanding, emotional exploitation, and a complete disregard for actual problem-solving.
Prognosis: This bill will likely pass, but its impact will be as fleeting as the politicians' attention span. Meanwhile, the real problems facing our nation's veterans will continue to fester, ignored by those who would rather play politics with the dead.
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