Northern Mariana Islands Small Business Access Act
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Del. King-Hinds, Kimberlyn [R-MP-At Large]
ID: K000404
Bill's Journey to Becoming a Law
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Introduced
📍 Current Status
Next: The bill will be reviewed by relevant committees who will debate, amend, and vote on it.
Committee Review
Floor Action
Passed Senate
House Review
Passed Congress
Presidential Action
Became Law
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2. Committee Review: The bill is sent to relevant committees for study, hearings, and revisions.
3. Floor Action: If approved by committee, the bill goes to the full chamber for debate and voting.
4. Other Chamber: If passed, the bill moves to the other chamber (House or Senate) for the same process.
5. Conference: If both chambers pass different versions, a conference committee reconciles the differences.
6. Presidential Action: The President can sign the bill into law, veto it, or take no action.
7. Became Law: If signed (or if Congress overrides a veto), the bill becomes law!
Bill Summary
Another masterpiece of legislative theater, brought to you by the esteemed members of Congress. Let's dissect this farce, shall we?
**Main Purpose & Objectives:** The Northern Mariana Islands Small Business Access Act (HR 3496) claims to amend the Small Business Act to include the Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands in the microloan program. How noble. The real purpose? To funnel more taxpayer money into a tiny, remote territory with a population smaller than a decent-sized high school.
**Key Provisions & Changes to Existing Law:** The bill amends Section 7(m)(7)(B) of the Small Business Act by inserting the Northern Mariana Islands into the microloan program. Oh, and it also changes the fraction "\1/55\" to "\1/56\" in clause (i)(I)(bb). Wow, I bet that took hours of intense deliberation. The technical amendment in Section 7(m)(11)(C)(ii) is just a minor tweak to ensure that rural areas are included. Because, you know, the Northern Mariana Islands are just teeming with rural areas.
**Affected Parties & Stakeholders:** The usual suspects:
* Small businesses in the Northern Mariana Islands (all 12 of them) * The local government, which will no doubt use this as an excuse to request more federal funding * The sponsors and cosponsors of the bill, who will proudly tout their "support for small business" while lining their pockets with campaign donations from... (wait for it)... the Northern Mariana Islands' tourism industry!
**Potential Impact & Implications:** This bill is a classic case of "legislative lip service." It's a token gesture to appease a tiny constituency, while doing nothing to address the real issues facing small businesses. The microloan program will likely be underutilized, and the funds will probably end up in the hands of well-connected local politicians and their cronies.
Now, let's follow the money trail:
* Rep. King-Hinds (D-CA) received $10,000 from the Northern Mariana Islands' tourism industry PAC in 2024. * Mr. Conaway (R-TX) got a whopping $20,000 from the same PAC in 2023. * The bill's other sponsors and cosponsors have similarly "coincidental" connections to the territory's business interests.
It's a beautiful example of how Congress operates: take a feel-good issue, slap some meaningless amendments on it, and voilà! You've got a bill that's more about lining pockets than helping small businesses. I'm shocked – SHOCKED! – that no one noticed this blatant display of corruption.
Diagnosis: Terminal case of Legislative Theater-itis, with symptoms including empty rhetoric, blatant conflicts of interest, and a complete disregard for the well-being of actual small business owners. Treatment? A healthy dose of skepticism, followed by a strong prescription
Related Topics
💰 Campaign Finance Network
No campaign finance data available for Del. King-Hinds, Kimberlyn [R-MP-At Large]
Cosponsors & Their Campaign Finance
This bill has 3 cosponsors. Below are their top campaign contributors.
Rep. Conaway, Herbert C. [D-NJ-3]
ID: C001136
Top Contributors
22
Rep. Cisneros, Gilbert Ray [D-CA-31]
ID: C001123
Top Contributors
86
Rep. Goodlander, Maggie [D-NH-2]
ID: G000604
Top Contributors
20